You would think I would be watching Food Network all the time because of all the cooking I’m doing. I’m not. I did watch it for a while a few years ago and learned some valuable things. 1. How to smash and peel garlic from Giada de Laurentiis. If you have a lot of rage to work through, just cook a recipe with a lot of garlic. And 2. If I never hear Rachel Ray say EVOO again, I’ll be a happy camper. Don’t get me wrong, I like Rachel. EVOO just bugs me.
Anywho, as the title above indicates, I probably watch too much HGTV. This was brought home to me the other night when I woke up in the middle of a dream about it. It gets more bizarre from here.
Has anyone seen these obnoxious promos they’ve been running about this woman named Cindy Stumpo? Only a woman on the east coast of the U.S. could have such a name. I feel bad for this woman. Did she know when she signed a deal with HGTV that they were going to do this? Did she have any veto power about these promos? HGTV is going to have to come up with the equivalent of witness protection for people whose lives they ruin with their promos.
The dream was only partly about Cindy Stumpo. Most of the dream was about Dooce. I read a blog called Dooce and Dooce just signed a deal with HGTV. Dooce is a fairly sarcastic, crazy, funny woman, who has turned into a bit of a mommy blogger since having children. But she’s really not cheesy unless talking about her baby. Seriously, if you saw this kid you wouldn’t blame her. Apparently I am so worried that Dooce is going to get “Stumpoed” by HGTV, that I’m dreaming about it. Issues? Me? Yes!
On a funnier and much cuter note: I got the title of this post from my friend who sent me an email with the same title. The email was about how her 4 & 1/2 year little boy had just built a 1 bedroom 2 & 1/2 bathroom house out of Lincoln Logs. He then went on to explain to her that the backyard was bigger than the house because his current backyard is too small and he doesn’t like it anymore. As she is in the middle of a house hunt, this clarity in the mind of her child is a little disconcerting. She had thought HGTV was a safe channel for him to watch. When we were on the phone later, he informed her that there was no where to park and he was embarking on a 12 car garage addition. We’re all praying that the swimming pool at the hypothetical new house will distract him from the reality of a three car garage!
***I should add that Dooce is one of the most famous, long running bloggers out there. I explained who she is, because it’s possible that the 7 people who read this have never heard of her.***