Want to know how to feel really guilty? Write about your husband’s drunk, glassy eyes or his insane five year furniture purchasing moratorium on your blog in March and get a really nice gift from him in April. Or you can buy stuff at the Wisteria Outlet super sale when you are not supposed to, like I did last year. And then get really nice diamond earrings from your husband two days later. Aren’t I an awesome wife?!!! (And obviously a savant when it come to grammar and punctuation skills.)
My guilt started on Tuesday when I found five boxes on the porch from Replacements. As my birthday was coming up and our anniversary is two weeks later, I assumed these boxes probably contained a good portion of the wedding china we never received. And I was right! What a nice, thoughtful husband I have! Note to self: Learn not to be a hag in March, because April will bring husbandly thoughtfulness and guilt. Unfortunately for the husband, my guilt is usually of the fleeting variety. As Mr. Bennet says in the best P&P movie, “It’ll pass. And no doubt, more quickly than it should.”. (Of course it’s the Colin Firth one. If you don’t get what the big deal is about that version in general and Colin Firth in particular, I can’t help you.) If you have an obsession with dishes like me and want to see what the china looks like, click here.
By the way, have you ever taken the Jane Austen Quiz? It’s kind of fun. It tells you what character you are most similar to. My result was Elizabeth Bennet. Woohoo! I found the quiz through Mrs. Mama’s blog. It’s on her sidebar if you scroll down. If I weren’t such a lazy, computer illiterate blogger, I would figure out how to put it on mine. 🙂
I know I am posting this on April Fool’s Day. But the above story was not a joke. If you are feeling cheated, here is a good one: I turned 29 today. Ha ha! Okay, that’s enough laughing. If any of you are hyperventilating or crying from laughter, remember karma is a *#%!$ (I may need to eighty six the My Name Is Earl re-runs.). I hope you are all having a lovely, spring day. Bye!