Attention: Pear Shaped Shoppers On Aisle Nine

Step away from the skirted swimsuits!!!

People, I did not think it was possible for me to look any worse in a swimsuit. Then I tried on a skirted one. Holy thirty extra visual pounds, Batman! %^$#*$%*!!!

Apparently, my pear shaped self looks better when I have that high cut line. Even though that means there is a lot hanging out that I would like to cover. And I am sure many other people would like it covered as well. 😉 I would like to apologize in advance to the state of Hawaii. I am still investigating board shorts. Please God, they can’t be as bad as the skirts!

Anybody else have this happen to them? Favorite places to shop for swim wear? Best board shorts ever?

5 responses to this post.

  1. Posted by lou on May 15, 2011 at 7:09 pm

    I just got two swim dresses from Lands End. One was the “grecian” style dress, the other was the regular swim dress. I ordered the same size in both and they run totally different. I really like the grecian one because it makes me look like I have a waist but fits way too snug over my tummy:( The other one is too big to tell, kinda looks like a maternity swim suit on me. That is not good! I usually go for the tankini style suits with skirts and have always like them. And, Hawaii will be just fine with whatever you show up in. I’ve decided the cover up is key! Just invest in a really cute cover up and your good! Good Luck.


  2. Posted by Jen on May 15, 2011 at 7:45 pm

    Man, bad swimsuit shopping can really ruin my day! I agree that Hawaii will be perfectly fine with whatever you show up in!!! I hope the board shorts work b/c I don’t think they do anything for my body type!!! Have you tried Athleta? I realize they are expensive, but you can order a ton at once in all different sizes and not have to pay your shipping that way!


  3. Why oh why did we get away from the long john style of swim suit? I mean really, every year us women put ourselves through this torture of self hatred and regret. Who doesn’t want an extra Christmas cookie? I don’t want to feel the regret 6 months later. I vote for a movement against swimsuits that refuse to flatter!


  4. Yes, this is me too! It seems counterintuitive–shouldn’t more coverage=more flattering? But I think the skirt adds pounds where I don’t need them! I don’t have the balance on the top half that I used to (ahem)–maybe this is part of the problem?

    I’ve had good luck just pulling suits off the rack at Macy’s, as long as I try on about 50 to find the right one. I like tankinis that actually cover my middle, in dark colors.

    Have you heard of the company Shabby Apple? They’re shtick is stylish, modest fashion. I’ve never bought any of their stuff, but I’m thinking I may try one of their suits this season. They’re gently retro and have good coverage. (Also I won’t be concerned about seeing myself coming and going at the pool.)


  5. […] It’s counterintuitive, but true–those “figure flattering” skirts can add pounds right where you don’t need them.  (I think skirted suits are adorable–but they look terrible on me!) Just because a suit is called “miraculous” or “forgiving” doesn’t mean it will be for you.  Try it on! […]


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